My Light House – My Loving Daddy

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“pa-pa, you’re my first ‘teddy bear’; your warm hug is my lair”

I never liked men, boys or male persons…’gentlemen’ as they like to be called, I always believed the opposite and even have behaved according to my belief. I have nursed a despise & dislike towards men. But, surprisingly, my best friend is a guy…my father! He is my confidant, my first love, my sweetheart, my protector, my mentor & guide, my teacher, well, almost everything. Especially when my Mom decided to move on in her life without her husband; we let her make her choices. I was in my late teens then; so, quite grown up to understand and accept! He never ‘showed’, but I know, he was broke. He was devastated & shattered, but put a tough face only for my sake! I never realized this as a child, but now I do. And I love him even more.

And despite my family’s constant pester & banter, my dad never remarried; he wanted to be devoted to me with his undivided attention and unconditional love! That’s my Daddy! I feel blessed to have such a beautiful gift in my life – my loving father! I wonder if I can really love him back as much in this short life!

my dad never ‘taught’ me ‘how’ to live. he ‘lived’ and let me watch him do it

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Even though he never treated me like a delicate flower, he has been very protective and possessive – oh boy! Interestingly, he always denies being possessive. My papa believes – and proudly so – that I am his ‘lion‘ {mera sheer bacha} – I find that funny.

Well, we shared arguments, heated discussions, disagreements, sulking, patching up, all our fights & hugs under the sun, but I still shy away from saying those golden words to him.

“I love you Pappa. and i love you more than two children can love their parents, cause you’ve loved me beyond a single parent”

And here I am ‘confessing‘ my love for Papa Dear  – no holds barred [Papa, I hope you’re reading this].

He’s been more of a friend to me, than a father, at times, also acting like a brother, so as to fulfil every relationship in my life. I sometimes ponder and then I kinda conclude, that to me, my father alone plays the role of both the parents, and sometimes loves me more than two parents can! It’s tough for a single father to be ‘motherly’ toward their child, one may have to acquire such qualities, which, I must tell you, is not a cake walk! A father may not be good at expressing his love, but my daddy is different – he has been very expressive, and I must admit, this is what I love the most about him!

“i cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection” – sigmund freud

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How can I forget something that one of my school teachers told us: “You can NEVER repay the ‘loan of life’ your parents gave you, no matter what you do” – I know it sounded weird then, now I can’t agree more with her. Pappa jokes that even though I was born a girl, I act and behave like a boy – rough, really tough, go-getter, audacious, throw caution to the air, dare-devil, etc. etc… He can go on and on about me. My dad jokes: “I want to find you a groom who will love you more than me.” “Damn! So you want me to remain unmarried forever, is it?” I cut humour for humour.

A father’s love is reflected in the eyes of his children – and if you look into mine, you’ll know.

My folks would tell us, countless times, “You’ve taken after your dad” – even though, he believes the opposite! Yeah, we proudly share the same blood, DNA, features, habits, thinking, even temper…to the last cell and nucleus..! I am a reflection of my Dad and he is a reflection of me!

Her Daddy’s Girl” is my middle name..! Cause I know deep in my heart, no matter how ‘older’ I grow, for him, I shall always be his ‘baby

“A Daughter Needs Her Dad To Be The ‘Standard’ Against Whom She Will Judge All Men.”

My dad has been the first man in my life, and so shall be. 

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And, “Don’t tell Mom” was the best advice he ever gave me..! In whispers though.

So, “Happy Father’s Day” to all the lovely pappas out there; not just mine 🙂

He holds my heart forever! Love you dad..!

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